Monday, December 13, 2010

The Difference Between Passion and True Love

Passion is a state of being and true love is a state of living. Let me explain. Passion is temporary it is a condition of euphoria that we all (sometimes) wish would last forever. The problem with that state of euphoria is that we would never accomplish much of anything else. We would be distracted...you know what I mean.

The initial sate of passion for a new couple is going to last for weeks to months. During that time it seems that nothing else matters and the other person is just absolutely perfect. Even if they aren't perfect, you just don't care. You'll spend as much time, money and effort as it takes to make them and yourself happy. This is actually due to chemical changes in the brain with the release of feel-good endorphins. Endorphins are responsible for most of the feelings and decisions that you make at this time. Your mind is on drugs - endorphins and other hormones. The problems start later when the period of passion starts to wane and the hormone levels drop as they inevitably will. This temporary nature is why we say passion is a state of being. The good news is that it's not good forever but the bad news is that it only comes back for short periods like those romantic evenings and weekends.

True love is a state of living because, although those passionate beginnings and passionate rendezvous can be an important part of love, true love persists for every moment of your life. It is a state of living. You can become angry and disagree over a problem yet know that your partner still loves you and you love them. You will work it out.

True love is far more than romance and passion and is typically characterized by the presence of shared principles, shared values and goals, mutual respect, consistent honesty, kindness, mutual support, good problem solving skills and good communication. None of these things are absolutely necessary for romance and passion.

In addition, true love requires a clear understanding of what each needs and wants to be a fulfilled individual, the desire and ability to help each other achieve their life goals and the ability and willingness to share love with active involvement to keep love fresh and alive.

True love feels good as passion does but that feeling becomes and enduring knowledge and confidence that the loving relationship is a very good thing for the long term for both parties involved.

Passion brings couples together and spices up any good relationship but the fundamental requirements of true love are what make it last for a lifetime. And, yes, true love requires knowledge, work, effort, commitment, understanding and more to succeed.

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